How many of us truly understand the final dance scene in Silver Linings Playbook? How many of us realize that it is an interpretation of Bipolar? That it symbolizes the dance we all do on a daily basis? How many people actually believe that “normal” people understood that part of the movie? Personally, I believe that everyone without a mental illness thought the final dance scene was disconnected, sporadic and made no sense. Hahahahahaha. Typical.
How many people in America actually understand the illness Bipolar? How many people think we are like the ocean with low and high tides, no in between? It kind of makes me laugh, but at the same time, it makes me sad. If people cannot truly understand what this illness is about, how can anyone that is not conflicted with it, know how to help us?
The answer is, they can’t. The only people that can help us is us, ourselves, our individual selves. We need to learn to be in touch with ourselves. We need to know how to “read the signs” as Tiffany says. I am learning, each and every day. Are you? Do you realize this is the only way for self preservation? We need to stop giving the power to the doctors, the shrinks, etc., and stand up for ourselves, know ourselves and be willing to accept that we are not like everyone else. You know, in a sense, I have to say I am happy I am not like everyone else. In some ways, I see my illness as a gift.
I feel deeper than most, and although some may see this as a disability, I see this as a gift. I can love like no one else. I can hurt like no one else, and although that part may suck, it also sparks a creative genius in me. I fought my diagnosis like a mad woman, no pun intended, for years, but I have decided to embrace it because it makes me, ME. I am learning to love me, and I am thankful for all of those who loved me when I couldn’t love myself. They looked on when I did my crazy dance with life and parlayed with death, and they prayed and they cheered me on when I couldn’t even hear them. If judges scored me, I’m sure I never would have earned a 5/10 like Tiffany and Pat did. I’d have been lucky to earn a 3 back in January of 2015.
Six months later, though, I still watch that movie and love each and every scene. I still have the utmost respect for the choreographer who picked the music and created that dance because it mirrors the emotional ups and downs, the internal struggles and the angst anyone who deals with Bipolar knows. I beckon you all to embrace your own soundtrack and dance moves. Love yourselves like no one else can, and feel blessed that we know a side of life “normal” people will never understand. Xoxoxoxo.